What We Ache For

excerpt from What We Ache For; Oriah Mountain Dreamer

We ache to touch intimately what is real, to find the marriage of meaning and matter in our lives and in the world. We ache to feel and express the fire of being fully alive. When we cultivate and refuse to separate those essential expressions of a human soul-our spirituality, sexuality, and creativity-we feed the fire of our being, we find the place where the soul and the sensuous meet, we unfold. Willing to do our work and refusing to separate it from our sexuality or our spirituality, we add a life-sustaining breath to the world.
One of the things I struggle with in life is knowing what is really real. There is so much fake in the real world...and I struggle to identify people that have genuine intentions. Oftentimes I feel like I am being played like a fiddle. A fool who wears her heart on her sleeve.
I too ache to express my fire and I hope to one day feel fully alive. I know I will get there. Fear is the obstacle I have always faced. Fear of looking like a fool for love, for the adventure of being alive! I have to push past the fear. I have to be willing to risk looking foolish, and pissing some people off in the process.

I know that place where the soul and the sensuous meet and I long to get back to that place because when I unfold it is amazing. I am amazing. When I am open there is just no stopping that force.
I am willing to do my work. I need to stop separating it. I need to stop trying to compartmentalize life. I need to live it, as I know it, and let the pieces fall where they may.