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Sunday, April 17, 2011

Exersize from What we ache for; Ch. 1

This is a writing exercise from the end of Chapter 1 in my new book, What We Ache For, and it may not make any sense if you haven't read the book. The exercises are supposed to help one tap into their creative working.

I'm just posting here so I can access these notes from anywhere :)

For Contemplation

If consciously cultivating your spirituality, sexuality, and creativity is the way you tend to the life of the soul I'd imagine my soul is near death. I have not cultivated anything in a long time. Years, in fact. I feel like I lost my sexuality about 5 years ago...what little I had. My creativity comes and goes in spurts, fizzing out much faster than it should.

I've not been tending to these things at all, really. My spirituality is beyond neglected. I rarely make time for meditation, something I want to do daily. I am luck if I find time to read once a week. I simply do not make time for myself and that has got to change.

My sexuality is non existent. That is all.

My creativity...I let it be beaten out of me every time it enters my heart in a new form. My necklace making lasted 1 day. Life got busy and everything was showed into a closet. My scrapbooking has been neglected for over a year now. Everything I touch remains unfinished.

None of these things are integrated. They are all separated. I'm not even sure how to integrate my creativity into these things. I know how to integrate the sexuality and the spirituality...I just haven't felt driven to do so for a long time.


When I write I feel free. I feel like I send my words out into the universe and they go to visit whomever is needing the messages I have written.

When I write I see how others could react to what I have to say if they could hear me.

When I write I discover that I have a unique perspective on life, and when I share it I am confident that sharing the message I wrote was worth the work.

I write because I have things I want to say. Iwrite because it helps me to process my thoughts. I write because it calms me down and helps to center my whole self.

I don't know...where to start
I don't know how...to stop allowing the distractions in my life...distract me.
I don't know if I can do this right now.
I can forgive you for not letting love into your heart.
I can't forget when someone doesn't love me with their whole heart
There's always enough love for me to give unto everyone.
There's never enough time for me to love.

The dumbest thing I ever did was to let go of my dream.

The smartest thing I ever did was listen to my heart and soul.

The silliest thing I ever did was...I don't know...I do lots of silly stuff. Go to Jillian's to play games without the kids and spend my tickets on a Whoopie cushion?

The saddest thing I ever did was forget how to trust others.

The hardest thing I ever did was walk away.

The easiest thing I ever did was love.

The strangest thing I ever did was profess my love for someone who I didn't even know. Love does strange things to the mind!


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